Are You Havin' a Laugh?

So you wanna know what's funny, do you?  I'll tell you what's funny.  British people are funny.  More specific ... Ricky Gervais, Stephen Merchant, and Karl Pilkington.

Ricky Gervais can do no wrong.  He's flippin' brilliant.  And he's an animal lover.  That's the perfect combination, right?  Right.  Stephen Merchant is 6'7" and weighs about 150 lbs.  That itself is hilarious, but he's also quick-witted.  Karl Pilkington is, well, just plain funny ... even if he doesn't mean to be.

Have you ever watched The Ricky Gervais Show on HBO?  

No?  Go watch it immediately.  It's THE funniest show on TV.  Some ridiculously talented animator listened to Ricky, Steve, and Karl's pod casts and animated them.  So basic, yet so side-cramp inducing funny.

These three can do no wrong.  I loved Ricky Gervais as the host of the Golden Globes (both years) and his laugh is a piece of heaven.  I want it to be my ringtone, but I can't find it as a ringtone ... which makes me feel:

I like Steve a lot more now that he has facial hair and isn't wearing "dad" glasses.  He was a tad hard to look at before.  See what I mean?

Ricky and Steve wrote and co-starred in Extras together.  Here is one of my favorite Steve scenes:

Karl is the "regular guy" of the trio, and was working with Ricky and Steve on a radio show when they discovered his flair for comedy.  They sent him to see the Seven Wonders of the World in An Idiot Abroad.  Basically they just tried to make him feel as uncomfortable and annoyed as humanly possible.  It worked and I loved it.  Here he is visiting Petra in Jordan:

See ... clearly these men are hilarious and you should love them just as much as I do.  They're bloody brilliant!*

*Just b/c I want to be British and live in London does not make this post bias in any way.

Sterling DD

Everyone loves Dunkin Donuts. What? You don't? Liar. Everyone loves a delicious donut and a nice cup of coffee.

Would you like to know what people don't like? Bugs. Unless you're an Entomologist, you don't like bugs. And even Entomologists don't like bugs in/near their food.

The Potomac Falls/Sterling DD has a fruit fly/gnat infestation that is out of control. I popped in this morning for some coffee and a donut (What? I deserve a treat sometimes). Everything was fine until I went to get a straw (don't want to stain my teeth) and saw a gaggle of flies on the wall. And by a gaggle, I mean a go-zillion. VOMIT.

Here is a recreation of what I saw (minus the wall):

When I got to my destination, I took one bite of the donut and then threw it away because I kept imagining little fly eggs in the donut and then in my stomach. Tragic. So so tragic.

Here is a recreation of me after I had to throw my donut away:

People who shop w/ strollers ... STOP IT

If you have to take your kid(s) shopping with you ... leave your Hummer stroller at home. Just because you have a kid and a huge stroller doesn't mean I need to get out of your way. It also doesn't mean I can't give you dirty looks or say something to you when you run into me for the third time. You're the rude one, not me. Also, for the love of God ... kids should NOT be able to push these massive strollers. For real ... you can't navigate the thing, why in the world do you think your kid can?! You piss everyone off when your kid is pushing the stroller and being annoying.

You know what ... businesses should ban the Hummer strollers! It's a fact that people who use massive strollers steal more than people who don't. Facts are facts, sorry if you're offended.

Here's my solution ... leave your kid(s) at home. Okay, okay ... invest in one of those compact umbrella stroller things or get a Baby Bjorn.

Alexandria Cupcake

Picture it:

Alexandria, Virginia

5pm

Beautiful day

Stunningly gorgeous girl (SGG) walking down King Street thinking about how she can waste time before meeting her friends

SGG sees Alexandria Cupcake sign & starts to salivate and claps her hands

SGG walks into Alexandria Cupcake and is surprised by how teeny tiny the store is

SGG is also surprised by the lack of cupcakes in the display case (the place doesn't close until 7pm and almost running out of cupcakes at 5pm is unacceptable and shows poor planning skills)

Man behind the counter (MBTC) is talking on the phone and ignoring SGG at the counter (which makes SGG very grumpy)

MBTC finally looks up and gets SGG the two cupcakes she asks for (Red Velvet & Chocolate Mint) ... and then continues to talk on the phone while mouthing the total SGG owes him

SGG walks out after a huff & a puff and sits on the cute little bench outside

First to be devoured is the Red Velvet cupcake ... the outside of the cake itself is a bit crusty, but the icing is a nice balance of sweet and tangy ... SGG thinks to herself that she's had better and she's had worse

Next to be devoured is the Chocolate Mint cupcake ... O to the M to the G ... the cupcake tastes like a bit of naughty heaven ... SGG loves it and has never tasted a better Chocolate Mint anything

Bottom line ... There are better cupcakeries and worse cupcakeries out there. If you go, definitely try the Chocolate Mint cupcake ... but beware of the horrible man behind the counter.

PS - Yes, people, that Stunningly Gorgeous Girl was me :D

Seasonale - You're a MoFo.

For those of you who don't know what Seasonale is ... it's a Birth Control Pill. It claims to be "a birth control pill specifically designed to let you have 4 periods a year." I'm throwing a yellow flag and calling BS on that one. I started Seasonale a little over two months ago and have basically had my period and wicked fun cramps ever since.

F U, Seasonale ... you suck! You suck so much that I hope you get eaten by a lion. That is all.

Good Eats - Fogo de Chao

The people at Hilshire Farms put it best ... Go Meat!

If you answer YES to any of the following questions, you need to check out Fogo de Chao.

1. Do you love meat?

2. Do you know what gaucho pants are?

3. Do you love your mother?

Basically this is a place where guys in gaucho pants walk around with various types of yummy meats (filet, chicken wrapped in bacon, lamb, sausage, etc.) on swords. And there's a huge gourmet salad bar with delicious types of meats and cheeses that I've never even seen before. Plus there are caramelized bananas, polenta, garlic mashed potatoes, and warm cheese bread (a.k.a., little balls of delicious goodness).

The concept is easy ... they give you this little coin thing with a green side (go) and a red side (no go). When you want meat, make sure the green side of the coin is up so that the guys with meat swords stop by your table. When you're done (or just need a breather), turn the coin to red.The only downside of Fogo, you ask ... the dessert ... it's just okay, dog.

Bottom Line ... Fogo de Chao - Go Meat!

*Welcome*

Hi! I'm Julie ... or Jules :) Welcome to my blog. I have lots of opinions and I'm finally ready to share them with the world (wide web). Enjoy!

Here's a quick snapshot of me:

I love my dog more than you love your kid(s). Sorry ... it's true. I also love to eat. I'm slightly addicted to cake, Slurpees, and sweet potato fries. I'm pretty sure I was on Broadway at some point and I strive to get back there one day (despite the fact I really can't sing). I own a wedding planning business and I love love (but I love wedding cake more!). I have a photographic memory, great table manners, I generally smell good, and I don't cry at movies. Oh, and I'm happy you're here :)

PS - Thanks for pushing me to do this, S3!